My friend and I have been having these discussions about this mutual friend (more acquaintance to me) of ours who’s going through this hellish break-up with an ass she’s been dating for 7 years. We’re discussing it because my friend is this mutual friend’s boss at work. Yeah, not a good mix, hiring your friend, even if it’s not a good friend, to work with you. It’s certainly biting her in the ass now and she regrets hiring her, especially with this drama happening now.
They went on a business trip this past week and they were trying to set her (mutual friend) up with a guy who works in the Montreal office. Apparently, she became quite smitten with him. When my friend and I were talking about it I asked her what his reaction was. She told me that he basically thought she was a nice girl, was everything that was advertised about her, but he was keeping his options open. He wasn’t keen about the distance – right, like that ever stopped a relationship from happening. Really, what he was trying to say but didn’t was that he just wasn’t into her.
My friend thought there might be some potential. I think she’s being a bit naive. So, I told her honestly, there wasn’t any potential. If he was into her, distance wouldn’t matter and he wouldn’t be keeping his options open. Our mutual friend will have to move on and I think my friend needs to let her know that. Or at least steer her in that direction, because it was her and this other women’s idea to set them up, so they need to bring her back to reality. It seems harsh, but I think its worse to give her hope.
This mutual friend has already gone through relationship hell, which quite honestly is 50% her fault, but having stated that, I don’t think she should be pining away for a guy who’s not into her. My friend needs to do the right thing and tell her to move on.
Relationships are already complicated, if you knew the other person wasn’t into your friend, let them know, because in the end it’s better to let your friend know right off from the start so that a) you’re not tortured everyday at work with their pining and b) it’s the right thing to do.